Ask Alternadad Something Else
"I gave up drinking right before my child was born after being disastrously rebellious in my teenage and young adult life. I don't feel a need to get away and ease my mind, like, say, going to happy hour or reading the paper at the local coffee place. And being with my child makes me a better man; I see myself doing so many less petty things. I have dreams but they involve my son. Does this change? Does this pass after the first year?"
My answer after the bump.
I may be the wrong guy to ask when it comes to doing petty things. If anything, I've ramped up the pettiness since Elijah was born. But I've also ramped up the non-pettiness. For me, becoming a father has intensified and magnified my pre-fatherhood self--I find that I can be incredibly generous and loving one minute and totally shallow the next.
But for the most part, being a father has definitely made me a better man. For now. That can always change. Fatherhood is not some state of divine grace, after all. As for whether or not it's going to change for you, I cannot answer. But the first birthday may not be the demarcation point. Wait until your little dude throws something at you out of anger for the first time. You might find yourself heading for that coffee place pretty fast.