Misfits Of Science
INT: Bedroom. Shortly before dinnertime.
ELIJAH: Daddy, what are planets made out of?
NEAL: Matter.
ELIJAH: What's matter?
NEAL: Stuff that planets are made out of.
ELIJAH: Where did it come from?
NEAL: A long time ago...
ELIJAH: Before you were born?
NEAL: Yes. Let me finish. A long time ago, there was nothing.
ELIJAH: Nothing at all?
NEAL: Yes.
ELIJAH: How could there be nothing?
NEAL: Good question. But anyway, there was nothing. And then from nowhere came a huge explosion, called The Big Bang.
REGINA (O.S.): That can't be proven.
NEAL: Ignore your mother. She believes in God. So there was a big explosion and then the universe began to grow and grow.
ELIJAH: And then there was lava and stuff?
NEAL: Yes. Matter. So that's what planets are made out of.
ELIJAH: OK.
Comments
Yeah, don't impose your misbelief on him! Just because you don't believe in doing crack, don't impose that on him! Why don't you tell your son about the crack? Think about this. It's a free choice! It's not right.
Tell your son about the Scientology. Tell your son about the Zeus. Tell your son about the little gremlins who live in his closet. It's not right, imposing your misbelief!
Posted by: Mieke | October 19, 2006 1:56 AM
And what about the Flying Spaghetti Monster, surely the world could not have arrived to this point without the guiding hand of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Posted by: Neil | October 19, 2006 5:02 AM
misbelief. that's a new one on me. don't worry, mieke, young elijah is never going to be at a loss for learning about divergent viewpoints.
Posted by: paperpusher | October 19, 2006 6:50 AM
I think I accidentally erased the comment to which she was referring while I eliminated spam comments this morning. There's been a rash of them lately.
Posted by: Neal Pollack | October 19, 2006 7:14 AM
I think you handled the whole thing very deftly. In fact, I smell another book! (And 10 percent, natch.)
Posted by: troy | October 19, 2006 8:30 AM
Whoa, whoa, WHOA! Ease up on the kid. You don't want to serve him with a white paper, for chrissakes.
And who's this "god" character you've introduced? He lacks definition and frankly, sounds made up. Contrast with bHotman, a well-defined, classic hero who melts things. No wonder bHotman has won hearts while "god" remains a sort of literary red herring.
Posted by: Tim | October 19, 2006 8:49 AM
Yeah, Neal, you dingaling, you DID in fact erase the comment to which I was referring, in effect making me sound like a total raving lunatic with poor grammar. The original comment I was responding to was one which, to paraphrase, said: " Just because you do not believe in the [sic] God, it is not fair to impose your misbelief on your son. Think about this. Why do you not tell him about the God? It is not right."
Posted by: Mieke | October 19, 2006 3:19 PM
sorry, mieke. dammed affectless typeface.
Posted by: paperpusher | October 20, 2006 6:28 AM