Mandatory Father's Day Post
This morning, I woke up around 10:30, a little earlier than my usual Sunday time, went into my office, loaded a bowl, smoked up, and walked down to the corner diner for a big plate of chilaquiles and a tall glass-bottle of Mexican coke. The dudes came over around noon. We tossed our boogie boards into the trunk and drove down to Zuma with a 12-pack in the cooler. An hour later, we were playing Frisbee when these three really hot Dominican chicks....
I'm sorry. I accidentally went back to 1996 for a minute there.
Actually, I woke up around 8:30 to find Elijah washing his plastic dinosaurs in the bathroom sink. He'd made a finger-painting of a purple caterpillar for me, which was really nice of him, and Regina presented me with a kick-ass Amare Stoudemire jersey. Then we drove down to Koreatown to meet my sister, brother-in-law, and niece at this Oaxacan restaurant I've been wanting to try. While we drove, Elijah engaged us in a kind of dialogue.
"I had a nice dream last night," he said.
"Yeah?"
"Uh-huh. It was a funny dream."
"Do tell."
"I was Hot Man. And I rescued Superman from Goo Man. And then Goo Man sat on a wall and there were trees and someone fell into a ditch."
"I see."
"Goo Man is a naughty man. He tries to hurt people."
"Right."
"I saw funny pirates and a flying blue squirrel."
"Thank you for sharing, son."
At the restaurant, the brown mole and the estofado were both pretty good, but the rest of the food was mediocre. Elijah threw a fit because we took away his chicken soup. We told him that's what you get when you blow your nose and put the tissue in the soup on purpose, but nothing could stanch his grief.
Elijah hasn't been feeling well lately. We knew this because as soon as we got home, he went into his bedroom, got all his pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals, and dragged them out to the couch. We tried to show him Howl's Moving Castle, which arrived yesterday from Netflix, but he got bored by the early scenes of the shopgirls yammering to each other. So instead, he drank juice and watched Noggin while glassy-eyed with a low fever. That's probably the best way for him to watch Noggin anyway, since he doesn't have the option of watching it while high.
Looking around the Internet at the parenting blogs, it's apparently required that I say something about my own father today as well. I really hate "Father's Day memories," and so does my dad, so I'll just say that when I called my parents today, like I do every Sunday, they were at Costco eating hot dogs. If I call my dad and he's not at his home office, he's usually either at Costco or at the gym. The two, I guess, cancel each other out.
Finally, check out this article about daddyblogging in the Austin American-Statesman. I'm quoted in it somewhere about halfway down, and I don't sound like an utter dipshit for once. Here's to you, modern dads! You're doing a great job. All hail the nurturing, product-saavy, somewhat self-absorbed new American father!
Comments
But Noggin has Jack's Big Music Show!
Posted by: troy | June 18, 2006 5:59 PM
I fear we are at cross-purposes on Jack's Big Music Show. It could be so much better.
Posted by: Neal Pollack | June 18, 2006 6:38 PM
Huh. If you don't have more pressing things to discuss, I am interested in your issues with the show. I just wish they'd make more episodes, although given that my guy isn't supposed to watch any TV until he's 2, perhaps I've said too much. I just caught my first Dan Zanes video, and I wouldn't exactly say that should be the template. Although the mandolin player's awfully cute.
Posted by: troy | June 19, 2006 6:52 AM
The mandolin player is definitely Dan Zanes' redeeming facet. Makes me regret ever criticizing the man.
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but only if you know how. Remember, society as a whole is both stupid and informed.
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