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There is no need here for me to analyze yesterday's President Bush speech. His hair was short, his arguments succinct, his moral clarity both moral and clear. I think that his forceful presentation should, once and for all, silence the 30 percent or so of the American population that still, against all reason, continues to wring its wet hanky of whiny anti-war petulance. Those who believe that Bush needs to provide "evidence" against the war have obviously neither participated in war or evidence-gathering. Every day, it becomes more obvious to me that my arguments on this topic are the only ones that matter.
I'm also glad that, finally, the President has told the American people the truth about Saddam Hussein's Nuclear Holy Warriors, who represent a terrible threat to all humanity. Now the facts about them can be told. The Nuclear Holy Warriors are four in number. Their names are War, Famine, Pestilence, and Disease. Several years ago, on a reporting trip to Baghdad, I met one of them. And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto him over the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.
Woe betide to man, I say, if Saddam Hussein gains control over the "beasts of the earth."
The one quibble I have with Bush's speech was his warning that a "very senior Al-Queda leader" has recently sought medical treatment in Baghdad. This is verifiable. I have pictures from a reliable source. But I will say: Baghdad is home to the only doctor in the world capable of dislodging a living porcupine from a human rectum. I wouldn't go to war, necessarily, because of some old man's unfortunate camping accident.
With the publication of Christopher Hitchens' delightful bildungsroman, "Why Orwell Matters," the whole world is abuzz with the sounds of people talking about George Orwell, whose real name, as you know, was Eric Blair. I myself am an Orwell scholar, having authored three books of Orwellian criticism: "How Orwell Got to Be Orwell," "A Pocketful of Orwell," and "Are You Sick, Orwell?" I've invited Hitch and my dear friend Andrew Sullivan to participate in an Orwell discussion on this very site. Depending on their schedules (mine is pretty open), I intend to have the dialogue flowing within the next six hours to six months. If any readers have comments or questions about Orwell, direct them to me, and we can begin a debate. A preview will occur in Aspen this weekend, when Hitch, Sully and I participate in the third annual Iconoclastic Intellectuals Unafraid to Break With Liberal Orthodoxy convention. The hotel bar scene is sure to be spicy.
Keep the aspidistra flying, boys!
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